I've decided i'm a dreamer... I have hundreds of things that i want to do and only one life to do them in.. so i'm 22 (almost 23) years old.. if i live to be a hundred that's 1/4 of my life almost.. if i live to be 80 (which i think is a good age to finally kick in the bucket) , that's almost a third of my life.... so i figured it's about time i come up with a bucket list... only i don't want to actually call it a bucket list, cuz everyone else out there has one! Therefore i shall call it my list of dreams...

Things that i want to accomplish in this life...

1. I want to be a successful hairstylist.

2. I want to become a published hair and makeup artist.

3. I want to go sky-diving.

4. I want to go to Culinary Arts School.

5. I want to reach my full potential in dancing.

6. I want to compete in the Mrs. Utah America Pageant.

7. I want to teach at Paul Mitchell the school.

8. I want to get six-pack abs.

9. I want to have a baby girl.

10. I want to invent something and have someone use it regularly.

11. I want to go back to school and get an Associates Degree.

12. I want to travel the world! (Italy, Belize, and England at the very least!)

13. I want to move back to California.

14. I want to own a beautiful home.

15. I want to have a miniature slider turtle.

16. I want to be the kind of mom that mine was.

17. I want to own a corvette.

18. I want to see a Broadway play.

19. I want to be best friends with my j-club for my whole life.

20. I want to have a love like my grandparents.

The fragile balance of life

Life is HARD!! Thursday night (Dec. 30, 2010) my grandpa parmer passed away. He had been battling cancer for almost a year and with it many many complications. Outfall from his chemo and other medical treatments included a bout in the hospital with pneumonia, two hip replacements, and traumatic loss of weight which ended in an ambulance rush to the hospital wednesday morning. For awhile they couldn't get any fluids into him, but after being stabilized, they placed him in the icu. When my mom called on wednesday i didn't really think anything of it. Grandpa was the toughest guy i knew! He was a fighter and stubborn as could be! He broke his own leg on the four-wheeler once and acted like it was no big deal! haha.. So thurs. morning when dad called and said grandpa wouldn't make it through the day it broke my heart in an instant! It had been in the back of my mind for a few months.. we saw him the end of august when my cousin jordan got married and that was when he came down with pneumonia.. i knew he wouldn't be around for a long time, but i really didn't think he'd go so soon!
He was the only grandpa that i have memories of in this lifetime. And he more than made up for the job of two! I remember climbing up on his lap while he would sit in his big rocking chair.. it was my favorite place to sit! He'd always call me his little julie.. He had the best sense of Humor and not only that but he was cleverly witty! I loved going to visit because he'd always let us go out and adventure with him! Collecting eggs, feeding the horses or pigs or geese... He was always active and i loved that about him! He was never too tired or too busy to play with us! He would always let us have whatever treats we wanted! And no matter how old we got, his coke machine in the garage was always so fun to get drinks out of!! He always had the best advice and he loved his savior more than anything! No one ever questioned what a strong testimony he had of the gospel! He was such a romantic and he loved to spoil grandma in every way he could!! He was so funny because he would buy grandma nice jewelry all the time even though he knew she wouldn't wear it! Guess he knew it was the thought that counted! haha.. He let us build clubhouses in his tool shed and run his fourwheeler and his yard to the ground!! Course he got after us when we got into trouble.. but we always knew that he loved us! He always let us change the channel on tv... unless it was sunday football.. football was important! haha..last time we were there he showed us his collection of belt buckles!! He was really good at collecting things! He had a closet full of the same type of plaid shirt, suspenders, levi's, and boy did he love his boots!! I don't think i ever saw him in anything but cowboy boots! haha.. he even wore them with his suit to church! i loved it! He had a smile that could light up the room! And when you heard his laugh you knew it was true! He would let anybody in! No judgement! No questions asked! He made everybody feel like family! He had such an open heart! I will miss his hugs! And him telling me that he loves me! I will miss sunday calls at my parents house and riding in his little truck and summer camping trips and seeing his loving face!